


Untitled

by traumingelb



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, M/M, Oneshot, i am so so so sorry, probably terrible writing and ooc
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-29
Updated: 2013-10-29
Packaged: 2017-12-30 21:34:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1023624
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/traumingelb/pseuds/traumingelb
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The next time Jean gets to meet Marco, he wants to do things right.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Untitled

**Author's Note:**

> hello friends i am so sorry if you are actually reading this because most of this was written at midnight while i was almost falling asleep and then the first and last part were both written hastily in an hour. i am so sorry

The first time Jean and Marco are together, Marco is dead and it is all. Jean's. Fault.

He should have been there, he should have made sure nothing bad happened to him, but no. He couldn't protect him.

Years later, as Jean lays dying, he hopes he can do things right the next time he sees Marco.

-

The second time they meet, Jean is up late in a college library, tiredly attempting to finish a paper for his creative writing class. Marco helps him back to his dorm after the third time he dozed off in front of his laptop, making sure to leave a note telling him to get some coffee in the morning and finish his paper. They do not go get coffee together, nor do they even exchange phone numbers. Jean finds him a few days later, thanking him for helping him, but then the two of them get back to their work.

Sometimes, they talk, sitting with each other during meals when neither of them have anywhere else to sit. Their meals are mostly silent, with the occasional “How have you been?” or “How's your day going?”, and although they both find it extremely awkward, they also can't help but enjoy it, feeling like they somehow has a link with each other, something beyond a good deed late a night.

Seven months after they meet, Marco graduates and goes on to a medical school in a city Jean has never even heard of. He's not particularly disappointed, though. Why would he be?

-

Marco remembers the third time they meet. He had been reborn quite a while after Jean had—so long, actually, that when Jean had scored a well-paying job at a daycare, Marco was three years old, trailing behind him and babbling on and on about giants and the specifics of how to kill them and how he remembers how he died, and how he remembers Jean being there, too. Jean, of course, dismisses it as an overactive imagination, just smiling and nodding as he talks in a way that only a toddler really could.

Time passes; Jean gets a new job and Marco grows up, as any child does. He is a normal person growing up, save for the fact that he remembers everything: he can't forget any titans, his gruesome manner of death, or especially Jean. The night when he finally musters up the courage to find him online, his searches only result in an abandoned-looking Facebook account and a few old obituary articles in a local newspaper about how he died at the age of 32.

That night, Marco sobs as he goes through Jean's old Facebook profile.

-

Luckily, Marco is spared the next time they meet. Jean wakes in a cold sweat once or twice a month, having a recurring nightmare of Marco's first death and the battle beforehand. The two of them attend a music conservatory together, sitting near each other in a few of their classes. For once, they have been reborn in the same year instead of ungodly distances apart. They pass notes in their classes, which soon becomes Jean getting Marco's number, and ultimately dates and an eventual breakup. “I love you, but I can't,” he explains, “You look too much like the man from my nightmares.”. Marco understands. They stay friends, even after an accident causes Marco to lose one of his arms and the sight in one eye, which Jean describes as “too close”, and even after he subsequently drops out of the conservatory since he can't exactly play his instrument anymore.

This time, before they part again, they both know that they love each other.

-

The next time, Jean can't even speak English. His family has moved from a small town in France to an equally small town in the US, and English had never really been Jean's strong suit. Marco knows French, though, so, seeing how lost Jean looks when his teacher introduces him as a foreign student, he immediately approaches him, rambling off in French about how he'll try to help him with anything he needs, and does he know where his classes are, and what's his favourite subject, and what neighbourhood he lives in. It turns out that they live on the same street, so Marco walks Jean home that afternoon, taking a few detours to point out some of the things in town, and they wind up getting home so late that both of their parents are worried sick.

A few months later, they take another detour after school, but this time, Marco has his driver's license, and they're driving to the ocean, about an hour away from where they live. Their hands are linked as they stroll down the shore, a little too cold to even want to go near the water, and they stay silent the whole time, the only sounds being waves crashing against the shore and their own footsteps.

While they're driving home that night, Jean tells Marco that he loves him, and Marco almost swerves off the road, he's so surprised. He pulls over, turning on the light in the dim car before leaning over and pressing his lips to Jean's.

They marry a long while later, after years of awkward breakups and eagerly getting back together. Their only children are a few cats, and both of them die happy after a long life together.

For a while, that was the only time they could say they were truly happy together.

-

The sixth time they meet, Marco is already close to death. Jean works at an emergency room at a military base overseas, and by the time Marco gets to him, half of his body has been burnt and his arm and leg are far gone. Within just a few moments of his arrival at the emergency room, Marco is already dead.

Jean is usually never affected by the death of any of his patients—it's a military base, after all—but that night, he cries himself to sleep.

-

The next time they meet at a school, they both speak the same language. Marco is only one year Jean's senior and the two of them are vastly different from each other—Jean has managed to dye all of his hair purple and has an affinity for punk rock, while Marco is a loyal member of the school's symphony orchestra and can't even stomach the thought of changing his hair colour—but they still manage to work things out together somehow. They manage to find each other between classes, holding hands for a few brief moments before Jean has to go one way for his algebra class and Marco has to go the other way for chemistry.

One night, they're driving home from a late night studying together and someone swerves into their lane, which would have hit Marco's side of the car if he didn't move out of the way as quickly as he did. They pull over, and soon Marco is in Jean's arms, and both of them are crying because dear God that was terrifying. For the rest of the week, the two of them are practically inseparable.

A few months later, Jean is walking home from school when a car runs a red light, making a direct impact and driving away as quickly as it came. Jean is dead at the scene. Marco is so distraught, he can't even manage to go to his funeral. Every year, though, he visits his grave, silently paying his respects, and every year, he can't help but tell Jean that he loves him.

Always.

-

The last time the two of them meet, Jean is 19, working a shitty job at a Starbucks in what he refers to as “the middle of goddamn nowhere”. Marco is job-hunting, a recent graduate from a university a few towns over (Jean would also refer to it as “the middle of bumfuck nowhere”), and decides to take a break at said Starbucks—after all, he's been working at trying to pick up job applications all day, and everybody needs a break at some point, preferably for some caffeine that can keep him going. Jean catches his eye from the moment he makes his way inside, and Marco essentially does the same for him. Instead of hastily scribbling Marco's name on his overly-complicated drink like he does with everybody else, he scrawls his own name and phone number, averting his gaze as he hands the drink to him.

Long story short, it ends up leading to five long phone conversations, three of which lasted over four hours and one of which where Jean fell asleep while talking, then 88 dates, most of which consisted of watching terrible movies, holding hands, and falling asleep together, then one engagement and one wedding. Somewhere in there, there are 20 failed apartment searches, fourteen lost jobs, fifteen new jobs, and God-knows-how-many nights of eating only instant noodles before they manage to settle down.

One night, Jean wakes up with a start, almost immediately turning over and pulling Marco into a hurried hug, despite the fact that it is literally 3 in the morning. When asked about it, he just mumbles something that would usually only be considered insane middle-of-the-night babble, except Marco feels like he actually understands what Jean is talking about, despite it being complete and utter nonsense about titans breaking down walls and people—especially Marco—dying, and after a while, Marco can't help but feel sick and tired of all this rambling and just returns Jean's embrace, shushing him. “Shhh,” he coos, “It's okay, Jean. I'm here, I'm not dead. You're fine, you did great.”

And for the first time in forever, Jean feels like he actually did do it right this time.


End file.
